Posts Tagged ‘Funny’

Cray Cray Crime – December 2016

Friday, December 23rd, 2016
#CrayCrayCrime is a feature on Jenna Kernan's blog and Facebook pages

#CrayCrayCrime is a feature on Jenna Kernan’s blog and Facebook pages

Wrapped Around His Finger

Most fathers will do anything for their little girl and more than one daughter has taken advantage of this. But this goes a step too far when a female bank robber convinces her father to be her getaway driver. Oh, he didn’t agree to drive the getaway car (it was an SUV), he agreed to drive his daughter to a “job interview.” While pop was waiting, daughter-dear changed into a wig, hat and sunglasses and robbed at TD Bank in Fort Lauderdale. When she returned with the loot, she explained that the interview had gone so well that the potential employer had given her an advance – because that always happens!
Worse yet – this was not the first time she’d bummed a lift. Nor the second. Nor the third. FOUR. She had her dad drive her to FOUR robberies!
Summary: Don’t believe everything she says, even if she is your little girl.

Source: SunSentinel, Fort Lauderdale News article by Adam Sacasa, 10-14-20

Cray Cray Beaver

BAD BEAVER BURGLAR

You aren’t the only one doing some last minute shopping and getting frustrated at not finding what you’re looking for on the shelves. A Maryland Police Department responded to a break-in call at a local shop and found this beaver trashing the Christmas section. Damages included an unfortunate artificial tree. The beaver “attempted to flee the area,” according the the official report and was apprehended and released unharmed. I’m very impressed that the St. Mary’s Sheriff’s Officers carry such tiny handcuffs.

 

CANDY MAN REPAIR

A Winter Haven restaurant is short one gumball machine after a “repair man” took the machine outside to be serviced on 11/4/16 and then drove away. This gumball machine had a racing-theme and $800 worth of gumballs! Police are seeking information on anyone who has recently been diagnosed with diabetes and/or rapid-onset tooth decay.
Summary: Gumball machines hold $800 worth of candy!
Source: UPI article by Daniel Uria

 

TOYS FOR TOTS VOLUNTEER IS ON NAUGHTY LIST

That’s what should happen when you make up the names of children and their fictitious parents and add them to the list of real children in need. A Polk County woman who drives a Caddie and receives public assistance assisted herself to 118 unwrapped new toys (found in her home) and, oh joy, she was a volunteer last year, as well. But now she’ll be the recipient of a new wardrobe and free meals for the duration of her stay in jail.

Source: FOX 13 News, Tampa, staff reporter, 12-14-16
#lifestyle #fun #LOL #Funny #Florida #books#travel #fail #craycraycrime

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#lifestyle #fun #LOL #Funny #books #fail#CrayCrayCrime



Crazy Florida Life – November 2016

Friday, December 9th, 2016

 

Life is just as crazy here!

Life is just as crazy here!

Alligator Luring – Yup, it’s a real thing!

Two men in Palm Beach knew it was illegal to lure and capture an alligator but they did it for a very important reason. They wanted to post the photos on Social Media. That made it a lot easier to catch them and charge them and much, much harder for the pair to deny allegations.
Leave the ‘gators alone – folks. They bite.

Source: West Palm Beach Post, Associated Press, September 27, 2016

I would have lead with Gun and Handcuffs in purse!

Why did they bury the lead? “Troopers said they found multiple Florida driver’s licenses in her purse, and loaded guns and handcuffs in her car.”
This from WFTV Channel 9 – interesting part of the state, Central Florida. Read more here…
http://www.wftv.com/…/fhp-drunken-woman-found-wit…/460166952

Bad Dog — WORSE NEIGHBORS

A Key West woman learned that it is illegal to use a stun-gun to quiet your neighbor’s barking dog.  The suspect said she had only threatened the dog which begs the question, then why did the dog have blisters on his skin?  Mrs. Gulch from The Wizard of Oz has nothing on this gal.  Any you thought your neighbors were terrible.

Source:  Miami Herald article BY GWEN FILOSA

gfilosa@keynoter.com



November’s Cray Cray Crime

Saturday, December 3rd, 2016
#CrayCrayCrime is a feature on Jenna Kernan's blog and Facebook pages

#CrayCrayCrime is a feature on Jenna Kernan’s blog and Facebook pages

Eye-Spy With My Little Eye

I didn’t actually know this was a crime, but apparently it is illegal to remove detachable body-parts and hurl them at medical staff as Largo, Florida man discovered when he removed his glass eye and chucked it at ER staff after he was released for booking on a domestic battery charge. He allegedly took this action after police warned him not to throw his eye. This isn’t something you think you would need to be warned not to do…but, so is domestic battery. Now the Largo man has also been charged with battery of a medical care provider. I’m sure that the police will be keeping an eye on this guy.
Summary: Refrain from throwing glass eyeballs in hospitals.
Source: Huffington Post article by David Moye on 11/01/2016

SOURCE: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/…/edward-michael-dorsey-glass…

Purple Pooch

An Oak Bluffs, Massachusetts man allegedly stole a car, crashed the car, broke into and vandalized a home, stole pills, credit cards, a driver’s license and painted the family dog purple.
He was apprehended and found to be in possession of alcohol and pills when arrested and, oh yes, he was a minor. His parents must be so proud. He also was in possession of paint. You already know the color.
The vandal was charged with breaking and entering, larceny, destruction of property, possession, assault and battery on a police officer and, you know what else–cruelty to animals.

Source: NBC Miami Weird News page. Article written by Tim Jones Published on Sep 5, 2016 | Updated on Sep 6, 2016

Kit Kat Klepto

This might be too much for some of you but a thief broke into an unlocked car and took just one of the owners possessions – but it was precious, indeed. The note written on a napkin that may or may not have come from inside the vandalized auto was shown in a photo and tweet by @jabbins and it read:
“Saw Kit Kat in your cup holder. I love Kit Kats so I checked your door and it was unlocked. Did not take anything other than the Kit-Kat. I am sorry and hungry.”
This sort of crime must stop. Everyone out there – take note and take precautions to secure and protect your chocolate!

Reported by Huffington Post about a tweet from @jabbins (Hunter Jobbins).

Candy Repair Man

A Winter Haven restaurant is short one gumball machine after a “repair man” took the machine outside to be serviced on 11/4/16 and then drove away. This gumball machine had a racing-theme and $800 worth of gumballs! Police are seeking information on anyone who has recently been diagnosed with diabetes and/or rapid-onset tooth decay.
Summary: Gumball machines hold $800 worth of candy!
Source: UPI article by Daniel Uria

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Jenna Kernan’s #CrazyFloridaLife – November 2016

Friday, November 11th, 2016
Life is just as crazy here!

Hard to believe!

Here’s This Month’s Crazy Florida Life Offerings

As part of my move to Florida from NY, I have begun posting stories about my new home state on my Professional Facebook page every Wednesday.

If you like them – go give my page a like.  Not a Facebook fan?  No problem!  Read my posts about Florida Life here…

 

NO, I DID NOT MAKE THIS UP — MULLET TOSS IN THE PANHANDLE

Did you know they have a Mullet Toss competition down here where people pay $15 to throw a dead mullet from #Florida over the state line into #Alabama? It’s true and looks like quite a party. I’m looking forward to visiting the #Panhandle.

http://www.florabama.com/events/interstate-mullet-toss-and-gulf-coasts-greatest-beach-party

 

JUST YOUR TYPICAL SATURDAY NIGHT IN FLORIDA

Why did they bury the lead? “Troopers said they found multiple Florida drivers licenses in her purse, and loaded guns and handcuffs in her car.”
This from WFTV Channel 9 – interesting part of the state, Central Florida. Read more here…
http://www.wftv.com/traffic/incidents/fhp-drunken-woman-found-with-handcuffs-guns-after-wrong-way-crash-on-i-4/460166952

 

POKEMON CATCH = POLICE ARREST

FL Tuesday again and it includes a #PokemonGo tip. When the police ask you to leave a closed park at night, you should probably power down. Here’s a clip from First Coast News, July 22, 2016″
“Police tase Florida man after refusing to leave park while playing Pokémon GO”

“Tampa, FL – Just when you thought you had heard the craziest story about people playing Pokémon GO, there’s this.

At 10:30 p.m. Thursday night officers responded to Ballast Point Park in response to a complaint of trespassers in the park after closing time. When officers arrived they observed about 150 people still in the park playing the virtual game Pokémon GO.”
All but one left when directed. The one who did not got tased.
http://www.firstcoastnews.com/…/florida-man-pokem…/279684987

 

EMU ON THE LOOSE

Want to see an emu juke law enforcement? Who doesn’t?
http://www.wftv.com/…/evasive-emu-sends-deputies-…/459569291

Thanks WFTV Channel 9 for reminding me that Florida has a whole different set of problems.

 

 

#lifestyle #fun #LOL #Funny #Florida #books #travel #fail #floridaLife



#CrayCrayCrime – October 2016 What have you done?

Tuesday, November 1st, 2016
#CrayCrayCrime is a feature on Jenna Kernan's blog and Facebook pages

#CrayCrayCrime is a feature on Jenna Kernan’s blog and Facebook pages

Cray Cray Crime

Every Saturday I feature what I call #CrayCrayCrime on my Facebook page– crime from around the world that stuns, amuses or leaves me scratching my head.  I feature all four posts on my blog.  So here is the month of October 2016, three posts for the weeks I’ve been featuring this topic.

Not Your Typical Church Service

Sadly a Florida Church has lost its tax-exempt status because the Tabernacle, as it is called, was operating what is known as a night club.  Way to capitalized on Spring Break traffic in a creative and not entirely legal operation.  The specific event that tipped the legal scales and earned the attention of law enforcement was called Amnesia which involved naked paint parties.

I have a strong feeling that spring break will be a treasure trove for #CrayCrayCrime

Source and more…

Home Made Bikini is a Clear Violation

A 59 year old New Jersey man was arrested in Beach Haven, NJ for crafting a homemade bikini from clear plastic wrap.  Police did not appreciate the man’s crafty skills and charged him with lewdness.  You can’t make this up.  Blame it on the heat?  #CrayCrayCrime

Source and more…

You Broke it, You Bought it

No use crying over spilled milk.  But one hapless shopper from across the pond managed to knock over two huge flatscreen TVs one into the next.  This turn of events so shocked the London shopper, he backed up into two other flatscreen televisions.  Crash.  Crash.  Two becomes four and the final tab was over $6000.  Best of all, the entire cataclysm was caught on surveillance camera.  I’m not sure if the ex-customer was charged for the damage or if he was pardoned but you can watch the video here.  No charge.

Source and more…